'We will never be silenced'

As an environmentalist, I'd usually be seen or heard debating and relating things like ‘Public Transport’ and ‘Clean Air’ to ‘Equality and Human Rights’ in our country. Yes, there is a strong relation over there which could be discussed sometime later. I dream about an 'Environmental Revolution' that could ever take place. That's rather a funny dream but hey, it could happen. We all have our perspectives to the way of life we'd like to live. They say extreme environmentalists tend to overlook the bigger picture while hissing away and sometimes shouting out to their respective government's lack of attention on earthly matters. I do not agree with this as 'WE' are actually the ones, most of the times, pointing at the bigger picture along with solid evidence in hands. We're pretty great in outlining a matter of life and death like that. And here I would say that we are only shushed under a scenario such as presented in the video above. (Got more important things to deal with than your happy-green-solar-powered-nerdy grimaces)

This is extremely inspirational: ‎"We will not be silenced. Whether you're a Christian, whether you're a Muslim, whether you're an atheist, you will demand your goddamn rights. And we will have our rights, one way or the other! We will never be silenced!"

As citizens of Pakistan, do we have a lesson to learn from this? Or do we have an advice to give somewhat like ‘maybe you should try blowing yourself up one by one?’ If that doesn't help, ‘dudes, let it go’? Maybe we’ve got comments like ‘we’re an impotent society, it’s cool to see you guys are potent enough to indicate a revolution, because fighting for rights is pretty awesome in itself. Our governors get shot if they talk about rights or try to use any of them. We’re kinda creepy like that.’ On the other hand, I asked a friend if she thinks any lessons wait to be derived from such an incident. She had a good point. If our government is toppled right now, the ‘Mullahs’ would get voted in by our population!

I read an interesting question from an individual the other day that was asked one of my favorite writers. We don't have choices in the circumstances that we are born under. True, but if in case, all of us are born under 'equal' circumstances, then would that account for the best system to live in? As far as the person questioning could think, along with his set of arguments, he would not be so happy to be ‘like’ everyone else, and to be on the same level as everyone else. He would like to be better off. Now, that is pretty ‘human’ of him to think in such a way. It’s true, we could be born under the best of circumstances, without having to choose, but when the time comes when we have to choose, we may still like to be better off than the rest. At the same time, equality is important and has its due weight in the system. The missing link is that not everyone decides to or gets to ace. Not everyone decides to strive for something better. And not everyone succeeds either in achieving something better. The point is was he given the opportunity? The ‘right’? Levels are automatically sorted out and defined. But the opportunity of an equal right is to be provided ‘in the system’ to avail. The rest is on the people. Fail or succeed. It all then depends upon who is trying and who isn’t. 

The-Sheila-Hype [Embarrassing]

Is it embarrassing that I haven't heard the famous song 'Sheila ki Jawani'? Not yet.. No. I got to know more about its popularity while surfing on the blogosphere rather than on television. Then again, I hardly spend time in front of that box to gain any knowledge of anything relevant about... anything relevant? :/

I think it's a little embarrassing since it's being talked about so much. Some are saying that they love it and some despise it. And I got to know that the 'Sheila' song appeared on local news channels as well, like in the headlines, saying how awesome it really is. Well, it must be something for sure. But the news channels entail an amazing, fearful and rather wondrous amount of crap as well, so doesn't that suggest that it could be potential bull-crap too? I should probably allow my ears the liberty to hear it once at least. I mean that I 'could' just youtube it, just for the heck of it. Even while writing this post down, I'm not making the effort of youtube-ing it. But then currently, I do have an excuse to not listen to it in respect of the holy month. Come to think of it, am I enjoying the embarrassment? No. I don't think so because I think that I find Katrina Kaif really pretty and I tend to enjoy the ever-so-popular 'item songs' of Bollywood. They may not stand eligible to be in my music player but definitely eligible for stuff like parties and weddings.

Well, at least I've heard the 'Munni' song. Salman Khan is... well... yeah... that he is! No? I think he is... And now I feel embarrassed that I never made the effort of watching his movie either. The 'Munni' movie? (Can't remember the name). Too lazy to google it right now, so I'll just continue pouring these precisely aimless and desultory thoughts.

A fellow blogger is actively involved in some kind of campaign, the nature of which I fail to understand and she won't tell me about it either. I mean that I'm eager enough to know more about it and so left a comment to ask her, but she didn't reply and instead left a rather interesting comment on one of my older posts. Is that too petty a thing for me to be writing/thinking about? Normally, I forget after leaving comments on blogs and don't bother with replies. Maybe she wants me to wait and watch her blog as she adds more posts about it. I'm cool with that. But then I had a valid question too. Oh... Am I embarrassing myself again? Petty. I know. But I will reply to her comment. It 'needs' one actually.

Is it embarrassing that I'm being petty and embarrassing? I think that it should be. My friends are whining and complaining that I'm not keeping in touch. It's bugging me because they're right. That's a little distressing but I will, eventually, get back to them. After all, life without them does tend to suck. And I must not treat this situation the same way I'm treating the 'Sheila-Hype' situation. Not.at.all. No sir. That's not me I tell ya.

Here you go, I just made a call to one of my besties. She didn't pick up. Obviously. Now it's not my fault that it's almost 3 am and she's asleep. Definitely asleep. I made the call though.

I inboxed a friend a certain number between 1 and 1000 and this was the relevant info behind it that she gave me .. 'for' me:

'Manchester United was born superior to Arsenal. Why? How? When? You aren't asking the right questions. And I'm not sure I want to waste my time explaining how history works.'

Yet another utterly confounded embarrassing situation it is for me... No fair.

Quite a number of e-mails are sleeping in my inbox, waiting patiently to be opened or replied someday by my great own self. They are both work and non-work e-mails. I'm dealing with this situation in a similar fashion as I'm dealing with the 'Sheila-Hype' situation. I'm wondering when I'll finally decide to come up with an opinion for it, after listening to it ofcourse; whether it'll be too late for me to tell the world how I finally found it. It'll probably be like:

Me: Eh, it was horrible/awesome.

World: Get a life. Katrina Kaif is 115 years old now and probably looks like Frankenstein.

One day. One day, I will listen to the song and show the middle finger to all. And thou shalt live to see.

A Letter to the Bastard

Hi Boss!

You're pathetic. Yes, you are. One of the most detestable people I have ever come across. As far as hypocrisy goes, you have no boundaries. All the abusive language that can be used for you would fall less indeed. I should invite all those (scary) girls from my college, who most confidently used the worst 'desi' abusive language ever, be it for their teachers, college-mates, boyfriends, whoever - the kind of language I was exposed to only on Pakistani roads spewed out by Pakistani men during traffic jams - so that they may use it all on you. I mean, honestly, you truly deserve them.

Let's start off with calling you pathetic again. You're pathetic.

In my faith, this day, which is today, is a very blessed day. All members of my family are happy and we have a little something happening tonight. And look at me, I begin my day today by calling you all sorts of names in my head. That's a reason enough to believe that you're uber misborn - yes, a charlatan, a bastard. In fact, from now onwards, that's your name. Bastard.

Usually, I ignore the bad in the people around me or those I come across. I truly believe that I'm a good person and that my parents have done a good job in my upbringing. It's not miraculous that I can distinguish good from bad and vice versa. Since you're the boss and I have complaints, we could check whether I have a history of cribbing about teachers. uhh.. Nope. Just random cribbing that I was entitled to (or maybe not) because only a few of those could have been a little stupid. But hey, you're nowhere close to being stupid. Or an idiot. Most indubitably, you are an exceptionally sharp and intelligent person, but not for anyone's good.

Do you honestly think that God will grant you heaven because you were able to make it to the United Nations and talk, I repeat 'talk', about the poorest of millions on planet Earth? I mean, the matter of heaven and hell is definitely between God and you, but since you believe in Him, I was just wondering whether you're anywhere close to being worried about his approval or disapproval. I don't think you are, or maybe you think that you have a plan B for that matter. I don't wish you any good luck. And never will I.

Bastard, you have the potential to turn good people into bad people. I don't think you knew that either. I am talking about those who are in your immediate surroundings and still tend to appreciate you. If they appreciate you, in my eyes, they are already bad people. I know that you are liked by many, many people from around the world. I do not blame them because I have yet to see an equal match to your level of hypocrisy.  

Let me tell you that I am safe, because I hate you. And you are a weak moron in front of me.

It goes without saying that I have learned a lot from you. And never will I follow your footsteps. I have never been the rebellious kind, still am not because I am a girl, who is going to be responsible for upbringing a generation - a generation that is going to be an awesome one, but I will choose to be rebellious where matters concern you.

I think that's all for now. I need to get back to delaying work for you.   

PO

You know you're from CJM when..

This was a facebook group that I came across and I found not many people as members of it. When I read through the info page, I had tears in my eyes as a flood of memories came rushing through my mind. The feelings can just not be explained in words. It's been 6 years since I left school, Convent of Jesus & Mary, and many more years will pass by, and I will only love it more with time. Even after spending 12 years of my life there as a student, and that's a lifetime, I know I feel that time raced away.

I'm posting those things from that facebook group so that if at any time now or in future, any Convent girl happens to visit my blog, she may as well be able to reminisce those days while reading them here. I guarantee that she would definitely be able to relate to each and every thing said here and would take a long time to come back to the present after reading them and suffering those flashbacks that would make her laugh, smile and cry at the same time. 

A very important thing that's missing is that we loved greeting our teachers and nuns. We used to run to them to say: Good-Morning Sister! or Good-Morning Ms. Anyway, here goes:

You know you're from CJM when...

- you own atleast one red bag & pony

- you try your hardest to stand next to a tall girl and ask her to 'saath saath chalo' (walk with me) in an attempt to hide your dirty shoes from the watchful eyes of the teachers

- you've sneaked your way into the bio lab just to see the dead snake

-you've experienced the feeling of pure, utter dread when a teacher said 'come with me to Sister Pilar/Sister Monica’s office'

-you've gotten up in the middle of the night just to polish your shoes

- you've heard scary stories concerning the skeleton in the bio room

- every play, article or function you've organized or written was value-based

-you've heard or hoped at some point that a swimming pool will be constructed in the heart-shaped ground in the junior section

-you've gone to school with a temperature of 103 instead of staying home to rest - just because.

-you'd skip school rather than go without the essay Mrs. Khan asked for

-you hear the words 'Oh God I beseech thee, ardently to desire, prudently to study.. rightly to (you know what's next)...' and a flood of memories rush through you 

-the bench in the basketball court has been your safe haven at one point

- 'do you believe - cher' reminds you of every ‘meena bazaar’ (funfair) you've attended 

-you've tried atleast once to enter Thevenet Center and perhaps been successful too 

- you call CJM your second home

- you've wondered how many saari`s Mrs. William owns

-you've been told off because a strand of hair slipped out of your otherwise tightly made pony

- ringing the gong to mark the end of a class in junior school was once the biggest honour imaginable

- you remember asking around for an extra-shoe polish or nail cutter before break ended

- you can almost feel the sharp tiles/rocky edges of the computer lab’s corridor as you walk from the junior section to the canteen (it's freaky how your hand's literally all tingly right now)

-you've dared to have a water fight in the physics lab using those plastic water bottle thingies

- you were fooling around with your friends in front of Asna’s corner once, only to look up and see a teacher peering down at you - and then you ran with as innocent an expression as you can muster towards the shed out of her sight

-you remember waiting upstairs in the senior section for the outgoing class to do their ‘special entry’ in school on their last day

- you remember entering the hall, heart beating fast, in a straight line with all the seniors already inside casually turning around and clapping... welcoming you to the senior section on your first day in grade seven- your first taste of pure intimidation.

-you remember sitting at the back of the character-building class frantically copying the weeks 'value' from a friend’s copy

- you begged and pleaded the teacher not to change your house

- you remember asking your friends for just 5Rs. more for the poor box so that your house could 'win'

- you've discussed the Grammar vs Convent debate countless times.

- you've felt a wonderful sense of unity when everybody prayed collectively for the death of a loved one of any student

- you've known most of your friends for at least 8 years

- the teachers know you as 'blahblah's younger sister' or 'blahblah's daughter' - 'blahblah's grand daughter' isn't a surprise either

- you remember Sir Paul’s music lessons and his piano on Thursdays

- you're never too old to slide down the 'bari wali slide' or take pictures with Mr. Elephant

- the simple line 'walk fast, don't stamp your feet girls' reminds you of a break ending

- you peer into every car that has 'I (heart) Convent of Jesus & Mary's sticker on its back

- you greet your friends by screaming LOUDLY

- everything in your world is red and white

- you can include no less than 12 girls in your 'close friends' list

- you think that everything bad happens to YOUR batch (changes in school timings, courses, school trips, exams etc, etc)

- the announcement of the council is/has been the most dramatic event of your life

- only you can understand what the games teachers mean when they say what they do

- a lower position of your house flag on the house flag board is a matter of personal insult

- no one does the 'tarareereeruureera' and drumming the benches better than you

- 'shitttt, duppataa!!!' is always followed by you running all over senior, junior and kg sections looking for one before an Islamiat class

- you aren't / weren't - aware of any world outside Convent

- you're pretty sure that none of the above will make any sense to an outsider and that's the beauty of it all.. 

--- You helped me realize that all the things I ever wanted to be, I already was. Like branches of a tree we grow in different directions, yet our roots remain as one; each of our lives will always be a special part of the other's. So today, I thank you for being you --- 

Happy Me; Happy World

A recently published author said in an interview, that in the process of writing her first ever novel, she chose not to read any book at all, put herself to an absolutely no reading routine, because she didn’t want herself to unconsciously adapt to any other writer’s writing style, while writing down her own book. I feel that I can actually relate to what she has said; I mean that there is a possibility that such a thing could happen. One could get much influenced by his/her favorite writer that they might begin to pen down their thoughts or stories or opinions in a similar fashion. 

Maybe I should or would put myself under that kind of punishment too, as and when I begin to write my own book. Only that I think that it’s going to be extremely excruciating and awfully painful for my brain and myself (also for the people around me). I imagine it to be like fasting, as in abstinence from food and water for endless days. I would probably turn schizophrenic, reading the label on a tea-bag while having my cup of tea, and imagining, or more like hallucinating it to be a book called ‘Villette’ by Charlotte Bronte or ‘Vanity Fair’ by William Thackeray. 

I would probably be caught by my family members, lying on the floor of my room, suffering a ‘cold turkey’ period. I would be accompanied by sneezing, shivering and periodic goose-bumps on my body. I would undergo an intense phase of emotional and psychotic disorder, which would definitely make me lose my appetite and the sheer thought of food would make me feel like throwing up and actually worsen my pain. In all probability, I would become an insomniac, staring at ceilings, walls and just randomly in the air. People would talk to me and I would not respond to them and that would lead to my staying in bed all the time with the muscles of my body getting stiffened day by day. 

It might be decided by my guardians that I better be shifted to an asylum for the purpose of my own good, where psychic psychiatrists will try to converse with me in an irritatingly polite manner and keep repeating to me these words: ‘I am your friend; I am only here to help you.’ And I would have no choice but to keep answering back by saying: ‘I am not mad; I am not mad.’ My relatives and other people who know me would make me a subject of their drawing room discussions; I would be the hot topic in many kitty parties. Mostly, people would be heard saying to each other: ‘She used to be such a sweet and darling girl (stress on the word: succchhhaaa).’ 

All in all, it’s going to result in the most tragic circumstances for me and the people around me. In such a condition, I don’t think I’d ever be able to write my own name down, let alone a whole novel. So, it’s really not a good idea for a person like me to take any sort of break from reading books while taking the bait of writing a novel. However, what I can do is that I try and abstain from reading books by my favorite authors, and whatever I decide to read, I make sure that it’s done by different, in fact a variety authors, in order to avoid that particular tendency which the recently published author has described could take place. That way, I wouldn’t adopt anybody’s particular writing style. I think that that’s how it’s going to be. 

Happy Me; Happy World. I be an angel.    

Feedback - which should be anonymous

And so I received the feedback to my 'golden words of wisdom' that were most sought after and that I most generously spilled to the sleepy attention-seekers. I do hope that they never find out about these particular posts or my blog... ever! 

The email was kinda long and Mr. Chairperson had actually combined all of the answers collected from various individuals, edited them into a gist of what they had to say and circulated it to each of us. We were fourteen people in this thread and a few (busy ones) were missing. Out of us fourteen, three have bluntly suggested for the organization to be an AOP - Association of People. Since I do not wish to repeat things from my previous post, I would just stick to commenting that they very well seem to be in favour of paying a straight 25% tax from whatever they make as their earnings. Because that's what AOPs are about. 

Secondly, besides myself, two other people have favoured Corporate Membership for the organization. The rest have simply ignored the question and not given any answer, even in the form of 'yes' or 'no', at all. Hmm...

One man said that they should make greeting cards (for Birthdays, Eid, etc) with the organization's name imprinted on it and sell them in order to raise funds. So, that means an investment on the organization's part. That's what I had said earlier. But, I also said, that they need to come up with a relevant activity, some action, some meaningful and engaging project, that has a noble cause behind it, so that people are encouraged and motivated to join in, and then raise money by publicizing it. Otherwise the folks would be left just plain confused. No one will buy your cards! :P

The most important thing to consider here is that 'Legally', these guys cannot raise a penny, if they don't get their organization registered. So, we come back to square 1. (Like I had said before, these guys are much concerned about raising money!). Now before that could happen, I only advise them all to focus on this thing called 'Active Citizenship' - start off with whatever they have outlined in their Charter, their aims and objectives and mode of action and not waste another second (even if you want to make money...).  

        

From ABC to XYZ - this post should be anonymous!

For the past few weeks, I have been drawn in, in a potential NGO’s Charter for improvements, comments, suggestions, etc so that it could be made eligible for an application for registration purpose to the government. I found out that in this thread of communication, in which I was included with enthusiasm by the Chair-person, there were quite some ‘cool folks’ babbling. By that I mean people like the Director-General of WWF and some renowned Lawyers and Consultants (and also one of my college lecturers!). Hmm… what was I doing there? Apparently, I was needed. I wasn’t able to attend their meetings though, because of my past studious college life (that I am not missing as yet). But I was pretty much involved in the electronic mode of communication that was and is going on.
Feeling incapable of coming up with something to contribute right away, I decided to take up the role of a 'virtual spectator' in this dialogue. I thought that when they will move on to carrying out activities and formulating project designs, I would definitely be able to spare some usage of my dashing intellect. Sometimes, I paid attention and most of the times, I didn’t bother at all. Why I was losing interest was because I had found out that these bunches of people were stuck like super-super glue to the Charter’s content. Every time I got an invitation to join them in their meeting, the purpose stated was: To discuss the Charter. Every time I checked what was in their e-mail update, it talked about the Charter’s clauses. I got sick and tired of it and I miserably wondered that all those biggies had been laying eggs or what. 
Now I’m just a fresh grad and currently in the process of gaining work experience. I wouldn’t know what clause or rule is right or wrong in the interest of the organization. But I was ready to learn! Yeah… sure dude!
So this time when I got an e-mail, I also got a call from the Chair-person. He said that he would very much like to hear from me this time. (Oops!) I hadn’t even read the mail carefully, but I promised that I would give him my feedback. I said to myself: ‘Chalo Amna, You're an awesome virtual spectator. Now... Time for some action!’
First of all I wanted to write: Dear losers. Then suddenly I thought that I really liked the man and he was pretty old and sounded well-versed (he even pointed out a mistake in my grammar once, in one of my e-mails… sweet) and always addressed me in the most polite manner, so I should not say any such thing. Then I thought of: Dear Dudes who think they’re such Dudes! (Make the D in the Dude sound really stressful!) But that sounded pretty rude too and I cannot do that. So, I wrote: Dear All!
This e-mail actually had a few questions that were looking for some answers. The censored e-mail is sent. I wished to include my actual and uncensored e-mail here. I’m not going to name any names here.

1. Should XYZ be registered as an NGO or an Association of People? The legal difference between the two is not clear to most of us. Some NGOs are doing creditable work while some came under public and Govt scrutiny due to some scandals. ABC Lawyer tells me that registering as an NGO is slightly difficult these days.

My answer: For God’s sake! Since the year 2004, you guys have not been able to decide even the ‘nature’ of this organization?! WHAT.THE.HELL. I’ll try not to be rude but you guys have a lot of free time on you. All this time when I had been getting e-mails of your Charter this and your Charter that, what was it all about? I am so sorry but I do not appreciate such randomness.

Coming back to your question, here is my humble answer. An AOP (Association of People) is very much different from an NGO in that it’s more of a corporate collaboration. An AOP is formed so as to earn profit. It’s like a ‘for-profit’ rather than a ‘non-profit’ kind of thing. As far as I understand the nature of your to-be organization, conservation being the basic objective, it should definitely be registered as an NGO, precisely a Non-Profit Non-Government Organization. And seriously, is this the time for ABC to tell you how difficult it is for an NGO to get registered? You should thank him/her for such prompt guidance!

True, because of a lot of corrupt organizations, it’s really difficult to get a registration these days. I ardently believe that that should not be taken as any hindrance at all. Firstly, you guys are taking too much time in planning things down. I think you should just start acting and implementing on your thoughts and motives right away. At the initial stage, there has to be some investment from the organization's part. You cannot just wait for the government or other private donor organization to provide you with funds so you could start off with your endeavours. Work some activity out on immediate basis, start making records and progress reports, build statistics of your target areas, population and workforce, produce results: show that you’ve achieved your defined goals within the planned period of time. Then present your ‘Golden Charter’ for the damned registration.


2. Should XYZ be raising funds for its Cause? Who should, and should not be the donors?


My Answer: You guys are so worried about funds that it’s not even funny!
After the registration process is done, XYZ can raise funds by making public any upcoming planned project that it wishes to carry out. The project's details, the aims and objectives behind it should be made known, so that agencies, private and government, are convinced to provide and allow funds for it. There would not be a question of who should and should not donate. And there should not be, I think. Your objective is to fulfill your project’s requirements and meet the goals. For that you need money and skilled personnel (who also come with money!)


3. Why there should be no Corporate Members?


My Answer: I'm not sure as to why you have a question of whether corporate members should be allowed or not allowed to become a part of this organization, because I really don’t understand how that could affect it in any way. Are they going to entice you into eating the money and not spending it where it should be spent? Well, that could happen! But a corporate member doesn’t have to be there to instill such heartrending emotions.
Personally, I think if the records and work being done is crystal clear without any loopholes, then there should not be a problem for any cross-section of the society, at large, to become a part of it. To date my learning suggests that making people a part of your organization who belong to different sectors only adds to stronger endorsements and eventual credibility.


I will update with whatever feedback I receive after this.